went to devon/somerset border to be part of a house party of six - three men, three woman. i only knew the friend of my brothers who asked me so i felt relieved immediately when i found myself in better than good company. so nice to be free of london for a few days. i took quickly to toast made on the aga, long walks with a borrowed dog in fields of sheep and patches of bluebells and even aquired a taste for moonshine made on the property - really more like calvados.
back last night and the boyfriend came over - he's been to states on business. hands all over me, i kept pushing him off. had to get used to him again. maybe it was that i was still on weekend mode of being mates with everyone and hadn't put down natural defenses. maybe its that...oh no, yes might be this, awful business after all been thru..i'm just not that interested in him anymore. after being with very clever people and having heard really good conversation and ate meals cooked by the boys etc. having a monosyllabic bloke cramming his tongue down my throat just wasnt'that appealing. oh dear.
anyway, i bought myself some time...i had to be up early this morning and told him that i'd stay at his tonight instead of last night.
rose bush by my front door full of pregnant blooms which light up my life at every coming and going - suppose i should cut them and bring a little bit of this paradise indoors.